Mother

Letter from a Mother to a Daughter: "My dear girl, the day you see I’m getting old, I ask you to please be patient, but most of all, try to understand what I’m going through. If when we talk, I repeat the same thing a thousand times, don’t... interrupt to say: “You said the same thing a minute ago”... Just listen, please. Try to remember the times when you were little and I would read the same story night after night until you would fall asleep. When I don’t want to take a bath, don’t be mad and don’t embarrass me. Remember when I had to run after you making excuses and trying to get you to take a shower when you were just a girl? When you see how ignorant I am when it comes to new technology, give me the time to learn and don’t look at me that way... remember, honey, I patiently taught you how to do many things like eating appropriately, getting dressed, combing your hair and dealing with life’s issues every day... the day you see I’m getting old, I ask you to please be patient, but most of all, try to understand what I’m going through. If I occasionaly lose track of what we’re talking about, give me the time to remember, and if I can’t, don’t be nervous, impatient or arrogant. Just know in your heart that the most important thing for me is to be with you. And when my old, tired legs don’t let me move as quickly as before, give me your hand the same way that I offered mine to you when you first walked. When those days come, don’t feel sad... just be with me, and understand me while I get to the end of my life with love. I’ll cherish and thank you for the gift of time and joy we shared. With a big smile and the huge love I’ve always had for you, I just want to say, I love you... my darling daughter. "

This was on facebook and I had to share it to my blog. Often times we forget to love our parents unconditionally as we get older and forget to have patience for them as they had so many times for us. This made me remember and take things on with a whole new perspective. My parents are so dear to me. I try to talk to them as often as possible even if it is difficult as I do have a family of my own and we are 1500 miles apart. But I try to be patient and kind with them and always show them the love that I have for them. You never know if it will be the last time that you speak to one another.

 

3 is for Exploration

Emelyn is just now 3 years and 4 months old. She melts my heart with her personality and those big brown eyes. When I found out Steve and I were having a girl, I was scared to death. All I knew was how to take care of a boy....even though I am a girl and know all about them, I was still terrified. As I look back I cant imagine what life would be like without her in it.

Everyday is a new adventure with her.  She is so outgoing and the way she sees life, puts my life into a whole new perspective.  Since I have started staying home with her full time again I see her in a whole new light.  I will never take for granted again the time that I get one on one just her and I.  Watching Trevor grow up so fast has made me more aware that time goes by so quickly especially when you are watching your little ones grow up.

 She loves the outdoors and every morning when I take Trevor to school if she hears the wood pecker in the neighborhood pecking on the light post out in front of our house she stops and says in a very quiet voice "mom, do you hear the nose pecker?". The first time she called a wood pecker a nose pecker it was so cute!  I dont have the heart to correct her.  Besides she has her whole life to call it the right thing!  We have hung a bird feeder in the tree out front and put water in the bird bath.  She gets so excited when the birds splash around in the bath.  She will run to the front door and whisper to me to come see the birds. She also has a fascination with the trash trucks.  Even if she is in her room playing she will hear the trash truck and run to the front door to watch the trash being picked up.

Steve started taking her to storytime about a year and a half ago. They went relegiously and it is something that she needs to meet other children and be social.  So we go once a week and she sings all the songs and even thinks Mrs. Susan who reads the stories is the only one who works at the library. When a book is torn she always tells me that Mrs. Susan taped the page.  After storytime we will go to the park and I usually try to get her to the park about twice a week.

She is always the biggest helper around the house.  No matter what I am doing, she wants to help out.  Her favorite chores to help me with are putting clothes on the line outside and taking them off, planting and watering our flowers, and sweeping and mopping the floors. I welcome the help because otherwise at these times she would be playing alone.  It also normally turns into a time to teach her new things...then again most times she is teaching me something.  Yesterday as we finished putting water in the bird bath she told me she wanted to make a rainforest.  I wasnt real sure what she was talking about, but I gave her the water hose and she watered the flowers and our porch.  As she was watering the grass by the porch she told me that in the grass was the rainforest.  I asked her what kind of animals were in the rainforest and she told me unicorns and lions. She looked down into the grass and said "mom do you see them down there?".   I didnt see anything, but didnt want to shatter her dreams of a rainforest in our front yard so I told her I saw the animals.

These are my everyday experiences with my little Eme Shimmee Doodlebug! Wouldnt trade these days for anything in the world.

Picnic

There is something about laying a blanket down in the park and having a picnic that I have always loved. A calm spring day and a empty park is the best setting. We went to a local park that is a favorite of the kids. There are plenty of large oak trees for shade. We packed our bag with PB and J's, some chips, capri suns and for dessert strawberries and blueberries.

As we finished up lunch the kids noticed a few squirrels gathering around us and decided they wanted to share our leftover blue berries with them. One squirrel in particular was very interesting to watch. We would toss him a blueberry and he would pick it up with his tiny little paws. When he finished one we would throw another to him and he would search around in the grass and pick up the blueberry. The kids tried to get a closer look at him and possibly even feed him by hand, but he ran away and they chased him.

After our fun with the squirrels the kids played on the playground and I sat on our blanket taking in the scenery. I dont know what it is about sitting under a canopy of trees on a blanket with a gentle breeze in the air that calms me, but it does and definitely helps me clear my mind. I am thankful that I was able to share this experience with my little ones.

Going to the Winter Park

Our great adventure.....we had talked about that we should do something fun with the kids. Something more than just one of the theme parks or the beach. It took a little thinking outside the box, but when it came to us, the idea was brillant and the kids were going to love it. Especially Emelyn.

As most everyone knows Emelyn loves trains! She has loved trains since she was very little. So the idea to go on a train ride was perfect. We planned to go somewhere we could stay overnight that had some fun and inexpensive stuff for us to do with the kids. Winter Park was a short train ride and had just enough things to keep us busy. We had talked about our trip to Winter Park on a train and Eme was so excited. She asked for weeks before when we were going on our trip to the Winter Park! Poor kid probably thought we were going to a park that would be cold and wintery! HAHA!

We had Grandma and Papa take us to the train station so we wouldnt have to leave our car in downtown all night long. The train ran a little late, but when it pulled into the train station Emelyn's face lit up. We all loaded the train and found our seats. Emelyn waived and waived to Papa out the window before pulling away.

The train ride was only about an hour. We got to Winter Park and the train station is right next to the historic park. The plan was to get off the train, have some ice cream, go to the park and look around, but once we got off the train we realized that it looked like it was going to rain. So we went ahead and went to our hotel which was only a mile away and not too long of a walk. Unfortuantly it started raining on us on the way there! Thats all part of the adventure I guess! The hotel was nice and had been there since the 1930's. When we got into our room the kids turned on the tv and made themselves comfortable on their bed.

The rain didnt really let up so we ended up ordering pizza and hanging out in the room.  The next morning we got up bright and early, had breakfast and went back into the historic part of Winter Park. It was still a little rainy but the showers were light. We went for a walk in the park where there was a beautiful rose garden and of course Emelyn had to smell every single rose!

After the rose garden we headed over to Park Avenue which is a shopping district with boutiques and restaurants. We found a neat ice cream and chocolate shop.  The kids enjoyed there ice cream on the sidewalk at a small table and by the time they were done it was time to head back to the train station for our ride home. We had so much fun and even though it wasnt a lavish getaway and it rained most of the time, it was definitely enjoyed by the whole family. Maybe our next trip on a train we can go to somewhere far away like New York City. Now that would be an adventure!

Is that even a word?

Our little Emelyn is quiet the firecracker. She keeps us on our toes and we love it. At 3 years old she is talking very well. Despite the talking well she tends to say words that I am not too sure is even in the English dictionary or any dictionary for that matter! Here are some of her funny sayings and words:

PT puter bug on you- PT Cruiser Double bruiser

Fumb tom freak- Not really sure what this means yet. She would call Trevor this when he made her mad.

Gruntl- Gentle

Miss Deffie- Mrs. Debbie, our neighbor next door

Compumtull- Not sure what this one is either. She said this word while her and Trevor was playing in his room.

This following arent words she said, but things that she has told me that were too cute!

Summer 2011: She would always tell me that I am her girl.

September 2011: She said "I am a genius mom".

Halloween 2011: She said while we were trick or treating "trick or treating so fun mom!". This was the first halloween that Steve and Trevor stayed home to hand out candy. Every house we trick or treated at Emelyn made sure she got candy for her bubby too. It was so sweet to see her ask the people handing out candy!

October 2011: Emelyn loved the moon and would want to go out at night just to see it. I remember the first time she saw a full moon and she was so excited that she clapped her hands and said "look mommy, the moon!"

She came in one morning while I was getting dressed and she told me that she didnt want to have boobies when she grows up. She has been obsessed with body parts.

You are my favorite......

Son! Yeah its true, Trevor is my favorite son! Thank God I dont have more than one son. I cant imagine loving another boy more than T. He will always be the first born, the first to make me feel the kinda love only a new mom can.

9 years have flown by too fast! I remember the day he was born like it was yesterday. November 8, 2002 changed my life forever! Trevor is the kindest and most caring little boy. He feels bad for other children and will always come to me to talk about how he wants to help the child out or make them feel better. I feel that shows an incredible amount of maturity on his part. We have some of the best conversations and he always amazes me with his insight on life. After we got his dirtbike he told me that he was born to ride a dirtbike and it was in his genes since Daddy rides motorcycles. Funny thing is from utero he loved motorcycles! When I was pregnant with Trevor, Steve was in the garage working on his harley and I was inside the house laying on the couch. The harley was so loud that Trevor kicked the remote off my stomach. So his theory that he was born to ride isnt that far fetched.

As his mother I am so thankful that he will come talk to me when he has a problem or has something on his mind. I have always had an open door policy and let him know it was safe to come to me with anything. I pray that he continues to talk to me in the coming years. My life would definitely be incomplete without those beautiful baby blue eyes in it! I love you Trevor and I always will not matter what-Mommy

When I grow up......

When I grow up I want to be a professional freestyle motorcrosser for three reasons.

First, I want to be a professional freestyle motorcrosser because it is something not alot of people can do. It is something that I love to do for fun. I enjoy riding dirtbikes because some dirtbikes are fast. One time I went too fast. Dirtbikes are just awesome.

Next, I want to be a professional freestyle motorcrosser because it would be fun to have a bunch of fans. I would talk to my fans and sign autographs. Plus I am a nice person. One of the things it takes to be a professional freestyle motorcrosser is to be a social person. It would be cool to have more friends.

Last, I want to be a professional freestyle motorcrosser because I would get paid good money. I woul dbe in shows all around the world. With my leftover moeny after bills, I would buy new dirtbikes and after that I wold donate it to pets, kids with cancer, and the homeless shelter. When Im not riding dirtbikes I would be a mechanic.

In conclusion, that is what I want to be when I grow up. FYI: All photos courtesy of "moms camera productions". Professional FMX rider is Kenny Steinke.

Eat...Sleep...Breathe...DIRTBIKES

Yep...this is what our January and February consisted of. Early school days, Fridays, Saturdays and yes most Sundays my family was out at Camp Keith(aka Keith Langfelder a long time family friends dirt bike track). Trevor was all about dirtbikes....even dedicated a school project to the hobby.

Where do I start???

I ask myself this....where to start after no blogging for what seems like eons? I love to blog, write, journal or whatever you want to call it. Unfortuantly the time just has not been there for me to do a lot of the things that I love so instead of blogging, enjoying my time with my family is what I have been up to. I would like to bring everyone up to speed on things that have been going on so I will do so here in a short catch you up blog.

The last time I recall blogging was November 2011, but prior to that...hum prior to that I have no clue when was the last time I really blogged. So we will just start with November 2011.

November 2011: November is always such a busy busy month and then before we know it, it is New Years. We always start the month with Trevor's birthday. He turned 9 this year (sheesh...I have a 9 year old...I blinked..literally and he is a big boy) and we celebrated with a small bday party and sleepover.

Then about 2 weeks later and it was time to celebrated our little princesses 3rd birthday. Another birthday that came out of no where. I promise I am present in these childrens lives however time is just passing me right up! For Eme Shimmee we had 2 parties, a small party with Jessie, Jasmine and Austin during the week since they would not be in town the day of her actually birthday. Then on her actually birthday Grandma, Papa and uncle Mike came over to celebrate.

December 2011: Nana and Gdad came to visit. It was the first time in I dont know when that Gdad was able to take a full 2 weeks vacation for Christmas. We definitely took advantage of the time they were here. We went to Bass Pro Shops to see Santa, but the line to see him was around the whole store and would of taken forever so we decided to just look around the store.

The day after we went to Bass Pro Shops we went over to Disney World and saw the Giant Gingerbread House at the Grand Floridian Hotel. I would of loved to stayed there longer and looked around, but our schedule was tight as we were trying to get to MGM Studios for the Osborne Spectacle of Lights which believe it or not I didnt get one photo of!

After these 2 outings we took it easy and just enjoyed lounging at the pool, having bbq's and spending family time together. Before we knew it it was Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. The kids were spoiled rotten as there are most years when both sets of grandparents are here for Christmas. This year though was somewhat different. In November Trevor began riding dirtbikes and it quickly became an obsession. A welcomed obsession as I wanted for him to have something to channel his boyhood through. He plays sports and such, but I felt he needed another outlet. We looked for a month and then found him a nice sized dirtbike that was exceptionally clean and well taken care of. We purchased it and stored the bike in Mary and Robert's shed. Trevor was not expecting to get the dirtbike as we made it clear we could not afford such an extravagent gift for Christmas...teehee..all the while we knew he was getting it! Christmas Eve rolled around and Steve and I could not wait another day to let him have it. So we wrapped a toy dirtbike that looked exactly like his Honda. When he opened the toy and had a stunned look on his face, Steve tossed the keys to his dirtbike to him. He caught the keys and could barely catch his breath. He ran out the backdoor to the backyard and jumped right on the bike and started it up. We definitely had him fooled. What a proud little boy he was and still is to this day! It felt good to provide our son with something he felt was a little far fetched for him to get!

Oh and dont worry....Eme was spoiled by the grandparents as well. Nana and Gdad bought her her first dollhouse complete with furniture. Grandma and Papa bought her Cinderella's castle also complete with all the Prince and Princesses.

As always when my parents are here to visit we tend to keep New Years low key. Which is fine by me. We had Mary, Robert and Mike over for a bbq and we played games. We didnt make it to the countdown and were all fast asleep at the stroke of midnight. Gdad flew back home on New Years Day so staying up late wasnt an option anyways. Overall the holidays were nice and stress free. As usual the weather was crazy and it felt more like it was spring than winter. With all the festivities it did seem to fly by and here we are in 2012.

Just Me- Amber Joy

**DAISIES**-They were in my wedding bouquet and I also have a tattoo of daisies on my shoulder.**

**FIREFLIES**

**DANCING**

**IN TOUCH MAGAZINES**-I am a sucker for gossip on a celebrity**

**2006 FORD MUSTANGS**-I love to hear that motor purr**

**HUGS AND KISSES**- I love cuddling with my babies!**

**SLEEPING**-I love crawling into clean sheets and snuggling up next to my husbands warm skin**

**TRAVEL**-I would love to go to Italy. But anywhere will do**

**PHOTOGRAPHY**

**MEXICAN FOOD**-YUMMY! Bring on the nachos**

**ROLLERSKATING**-My daddy and I used to go rollerskating when I was a little girl**

**KOBE STEAKHOUSE**

**MUSIC**-I like a little bit of everything**

**RAINY NIGHTS**-The smell right when it starts to rain is the best**

**MARILYN MONROE**-She intrigues me**

**CANDLES**-Scents can take you back to memories forgotten**

**A CLEAN HOUSE**-I love the way my house smells when its clean. It usually doesnt stay clean long**

**BOXERS**-The best dog a family can have. You have not owned a dog till you had a boxer.**

**READING**

**GOTHIC**-Yes one would not expect this from me, but I do like things a little dark.**

**MY FRIENDS**- I value each and every one of my friendships. You are all exceptionally special to me**

**KAROKE**-Only do this when I have had a few drinks**

**EXERCISE**-Yoga or Cycling anyone?!**

**PINA COLADAS**

**SIESTA KEY**-The best beach in Florida!**

**FAMILY**-I love to spend time with my family. We have so much fun together**

**LAUGHING TILL IT HURTS**-A good laugh is great for your soul.I like to laugh so hard that I can barely catch my breath**

**RAIN PUDDLES**-Jumping in them are the most fun**

**4-WHEELING**

**BEING WITH TREVOR**- Any time we are together!**

**$MONEY$**-gotta support the shopping habit**

**BIRTHDAYS**-I love to celebrate my birthday and Trevors.Growing up birthdays were a big deal**
**HOT AIR BALLOONS**- When I was a little girl we used to go watch the hot air balloon festivals in town. Its awesome to watch them take off**

**MY HUSBAND**-I love being alone with him. I love our date nights and the times that we can talk. He is an amazing husband and father!**

**PLAYING WII**-Its the most fun on game night with Steve and Trevor.**

**FALL**- Probably my favorite season. I love when the leaves start falling and the weather is a little cooler.**

**CRAFTING**- Whether it be scrapbooking or making hairbows....I love doing crafts. To see what you can accomplish with a few pieces of paper, ribbon and some glue is an amazing feeling.**

**BLOGGING**- When I sit down to blog, I dont know what comes over me. The words just flow. I may not always spell correctly and I know my grammar is not so great either, but who cares....This is ME!**

Breath It In

 
That was the advice for my sister on her wedding day.  As I walked her to the spot she would wait for our dad to walk her down the aisle, those were the words I told her.  It was something no one told me on that special day.  I was engulfed in the excitement of the day. Once it was over I took a deep breath and it hit me.  That was it.  A year of planning, several dress fittings, a shower, some parties and I was waking up in our honeymoon suite wondering what just happened. 

    This advice doesnt just apply on your wedding day, but to everything in life.  Even when you try to savor every little minute, when it is all said and done you still wish you could go back and do it again.

    The whole week of my sister's wedding I couldnt believe the time had come.  To me my sister was still that little girl being silly and doing goofy things.  The little girl who tagged a long behind me wanting to be just like her big sister.

  Now she was getting married and the next day wouldnt just be my little sister, but Michael's wife.  As my Dad walked her down the isle it hit me that just around the corner, in the blink of an eye everything changes.  No matter how we breath it in the moment will come and pass. 

Its Our 10th Anniversary!!!

Its amazing how the last 10 years have just flown by.  Is it cause we have been having so much fun with our babies, we are caught up in everyday life or time does just fly by?  Whatever it is, one thing is forsure these have been the best 10 years of my life.

No one ever said that marriage would be hard work.  But as so many of our friends around us have gotten divorces or split up, I am realizing that it is truely incredible that we have made it this far.  I look back at the road blocks and hurdles we have had to overcome to make it this far and I am in awe of how far we have come. Here are some vows that we make sure of to keep our marriage growing strong. Sometimes we need to be reminded of them, but for the most part this is what has kept us together.

1). Forgiveness.  Forgive and move on. Nothing will damage a marriage more than holding onto an old hurt. Everyone makes mistakes. Move on.

2). Compromise-This is a hard one to remember, but you have to compromise on things. Whether it be what movie you see on date night to parenting your children. You may not always see eye to eye and thats okay.

3). Never go to bed angry. This is one that I walked into this marriage with and will probably always be at the top of my list. I doesnt feel good to wake up the next morning knowing that a disagreement isnt resolved.

4). Date night alone at least once a month. This one is hard being that we have 2 little ones at home. Gesh we feel bad leaving Trevor at home tonight and not taking him with us. He really wants to tag along.

5). Listen to your spouse.  It isnt always easy and sometimes their stories may not interest you, but at least he is coming to talk to you.  When he stops talking, that is when you should start worrying.

6). Go to bed together even if you are not tired.  This is another one that is hard to do cause we are not always tired at the same time. We at least try to go to bed for the majority of the time together.

7). Enjoy each others hobbies together. Another one that is hard especially when your hubby likes motorcycles and you like crafts, but let me tell you what.  We had the most fun rebuilding a Harley together and I loved when Steve sat down at Christmas and made crafts with the kids and I.

8). Its okay to disagree and sometimes you have to agree to disagree. 

9). Dont leave the house without saying I love you. It may very well be the last time you see each other. A motorcycle accident taught me that one.

10). Have time for yourself.  Sometimes the best recharge is when you get some alone time. If you dont take care of yourself, how can you take care of your family and your marriage.

Induction Day

November 7: We were scheduled for an induction due to the gestational diabetes and the dr was worried about the size of the baby. I was scheduled for the induction at 6am.  I didnt know really what to expect other than I was going to the hospital and the induction would be started to get my labor going. The nurses administered 2 ivs which I hated. I felt like I had to be so carefull not to pull them out and boy did it hurt getting them put in. One iv was for fluids and the other was for the insulin just to keep my blood sugars under control. Dr. R wanted to do the gel pill induction before pitocin because I wasnt dilated and my cervix wasnt ripe yet. The way that the gel pill worked is the pill was inserted behind my cervix. Only 1 pill could be inserted every 4 hours. Talk about a long process.  I did not want to be couped up in a hospital bed so we walked around the L & D ward. I was not dilated at all! After 5 pills at 12am on the 8th of November I was only 1-2cm.

November 8: 12am....Dr R had just broke my bag of waters which was a very weird experience in its self and immediately brought on some pretty uncomfortable contractions. Imagine being able to breath comfortably and then it hits you like a ton of bricks.  It was too early for the epidural and I was so tired so the nurses were able to give me a small dosage of demerol which knocked me on my butt. I was out of it. It was almost as if I could hear everyone around me, but I could not respond. Not a great feeling, but I slept.

 Next thing I knew it was 7am and the demerol was not working what so ever. My contractions were at a pain level of 9 and I was dilated to about a 5. The epidural was the only thing on my mind. The anethesiologist finally got there and he had some trouble getting the epidural cath in my spinal column. Finally he got it and like magic all the pain was gone and I went right back to sleep.

About 9:40am the nurse came in to turn me over and she decided to check me. She could see Trevor's head and told me not to sneeze, breathe or move. If I did, I would have the baby on my own. I was slightly panicked as Steve had just left to go home to get the camera. My inlaws ran downstairs to get him. Dr R almost didnt make it. He was at the Kissimmee office and I was about 20 minutes away. He made it in 10 minutes. The room was full of so many people for Trevor's birthday. Since I was a gestational diabetic and there was some concern over Trevor's blood sugars, the nursery brought in 3 nurses. My nurse asked if I minded 3 female students to watch the birth. I didnt much care at that point. Then at my head was Steve and to his right were the camcorder on a tripod and my mom and Steves mom. The deal was they could be in there, but had to stay behind me.

Dr R came in got his gear on, they got me all ready and he said when I tell you to push I want you to push really good. I seriously couldnt feel a thing. I was so numb. When he said push push push push push, I just did even though I could feel anything. I pushed 5 times and that was all it took to bring our little man into the world. At 10:18am on November 8th, 2002 Dr R held him up, let Steve cut the cord and then Trevor was passed over to the nursery nurses. He cried a lot and the whole time and I was thinking, JUST GIVE ME MY BABY! I wanted to hold him and see him. He had been a part of me for 9 months. Those few minutes seemed like eternity. Then they passed him to me and I fell in love. He wimpered a little, but for the most part was very quiet once he was placed in my arms. I remember looking up at Steve in amazement that we made this perfect little person. Trevor's testing wasnt done and his blood sugars were dropping so he was taken to the nursery.

When they brought him back to me the first thing I did was strip his clothes off. I wanted to count his toes and see whose feet he had. I wanted to take in every single inch of his little body. It may sound weird, but I couldnt wait to know every inch of him. He smelled so perfect. Even before his first bath he smelled just like a baby. He had dark hair and a beautiful complexion. The one thing we could not get over is the fact that he  had HUGE hunds. He got his hands from the Joy side of the family for sure.  We had many visitors that first day. Being that he was the first grandchild the grandparents couldnt get enough of him.

I could of not have asked for a better experience. My mom asked me if I could do it all again the next day and I remember telling her heck ya. It was a breeze. I just thanked God that our baby was born healthy. We were finally our own little family.

November 2002

November 1: Well only 8 more days and we will be having a baby. I am getting anxious and somewhat scared. I know everything will be fine, but its scary not knowing what to expect or whats going to happen.

November 4: Today Dr. R sent me to the hospital to be evaluated since I was having some pretty bad swelling. I was for sure that they would go ahead with the induction, but Dr. R wants to be positive that the baby is as close to full term as possible. He does want me to be on bedrest till Thursday.

November 7: The induction is today at 6am. I have all of these emotions that I just cant explain. From anxious to excited. I have waited so long for this.

October 2002

October 1: Lastnight we started Lamaze. I hope it helps Steve to get a little more into the delivery. He is a bit squimish. I dont blame him. My body is going to be doing all the work. I am a little scared myself, but this baby has to come out one way or another!

October 4: Today was my sono. Trevor weighed 5 pounds. He is a bug boy. His abdomen measurements put me at 34 weeks and 5 days, 2 weeks ahead. Joseph(the sono tech) said we will have to watch him to make sure he doesnt get too big too fast which is common for gest diabetes babies. I have a dr appt on Mon. so we will know more then. Trevor has had the hiccups every morning this week. Even Steve felt them.

October 11: Well this week was pretty eventful. MOnday at my drs appt he decided to put me on insulin so Thursday I started giving myself the insulin shots.  I guess I am pretty good at it. Its amazing what you can out your mind to doing for the sake of your child. I never thought I could give myself shots. I feel like this has made me a stronger person. I just want Trevor to be healthy. Thats my goal. A strong healthy baby boy.

October 25: We only have 2 more weeks left since Dr. R isnt letting me go past 38 weeks. I hope Trevor doesnt get much bigger. It feels like my rib cage is sitting on his little bottom.

September 2002

September: I didnt journal a lot this month. I had a lot going on. This was when I found out that I was a gestational diabetic. I think that my mind was really occupied with the worry of that.

September 19: I think Trevor is ready to come out. I have had contractions everyday this week.

September 20: We went to Pointe Orlando to see a movie and I was having some real bad contractions. I could barely walk to the car after the movie. They last for about 3 hours and then just stopped. If these contractions are only practice, I cant imagine what the real ones will feel like.

August 2002

August 13: Wow! The third trimester! I cant believe it. Where has time gone. This weekend was spent in Lousiana. It was time to take my brother and sister back to my parents from staying the summer with us. We celebrated my mom and I's bdays. To think the next time I see my family Trevor will be here. My mom brought me Trevor's baby book and I absolutely love it and cant wait to fill it all out. He is so active! Especially at night! Sometimes he wakes me up in the middle of the night. I love to feel him move. I know he is growing strong. On the 11th I could see my stomach moving as he moved. That was weird. Like I had an alien in there. I try to involve Steve as much as I can. I am sure this is weird for him. I hope he is excited. I know he wants Trevor to be here already. Its hard for Steve to grow a bond with Trevor while he is in my belly. Steve is going to be a great father. I just know it.

 August 23: 7 months today! Time has flown. In 3 months from today we will be meeting our little boy. I am getting so anxious. I want to set up his nursery and get everything ready for his arrival. I also cant wait for my baby showers from work and then my shower April is throwing. So many things are happening.

August 30: Its amazing the love that I am beginning to feel for Trevor. I guess I have finally realized that a baby will be entering our lives soon. I cant wait to be a mother. I cant imagine the love I will feel for him when I get to hold him for the first time in my arms.

June 2002

June: Figuring out what to name the baby has been so hard to agree on. We already had a girl name chosen, but not a boy. My mom called today and said that she had an idea for a name. She said Trevor. I liked it and mentioned it to Steve and he liked it a lot too. So Trevor Ray will be our little bundle of Joys name! I hope he looks like a Trevor.

June 26: The baby is starting to move a lot! I cant wait till Steve can feel him move too. I am getting very excited! I want to see Trevor. I want to smell his soft baby skin. Babies always smell so good. I hope he is cute like Steve was when he was born. I guess I am really starting to show now. Aunt Stef came over tonight and she couldnt believe it! Only one more week till we see mom and dad. I cant wait.

May 2002

May 3: I am so excited! Today we are leaving to meet my family in Mississippi cause Dad is buying Steve's Yamaha. I cant wait to see them. We are taking the sono tape and pictures. Moms bringing me some baby stuff she bought. We are going to have so much fun! I also have a doctors appt this morning. Its my 4 week ck up. I cant wait! I had my drs appt and they were unable to get the babies heartbeat on the monitor so they did a sono. The baby was doing somersaults. They said that the baby is more than likely a boy, but we will have to wait and see in July at my 20 week sono. I think I felt the baby move this weekend, but I am not sure.

May 31: Its A BOY!!! We had a sonogram yesterday and sure enough its a boy in there. I am excited! I dont think I really cared what it was just as long as it didnt have 2 heads! He is so precious. He actually looks like a baby now. Thru the whole sono he had his hands in his mouth. He has some long legs too. I cant wait to meet this precious wonder growing inside me.

Cravings: Strawberry Banana Smoothies, Mexican Food, popscicles, candy spree, lemons

April 2002

April 22: I had my sono today and I am 9.2 weeks with a due date of Nov. 23rd. We heard the heartbeat.  It was 168 beats per minute. The baby was moving inside my belly. Its little legs were moving. This is so amazing! I cant believe the baby is so small. I cant even feel it moving. It just amazes me. There is actually a growing baby inside me! I am so happy. :)

Cravings: Snowcones from the ice cream truck, fruit roll ups, olives, lemon ices, mexican food